Upsherin

 Upsherin may not be the most venerable minhag in Yiddishkeit, and neither I nor my wife had it from our families. Nevertheless, we chose to adopt it for our sons. I would like to share a little of what it symbolizes to us. This will be a double post, as I encountered a midrash while reviewing for publication that required a different approach to the one I originally formulated nearly a year ago. 

One source that is brought down is the mitzvah of 'orlah. Famously, Devarim 20:19 includes the phrase, "ki ha-adam eitz ha-sadeh," which various midrashim take homiletically, as "man is like a tree of the field". As with many symbolic teachings, we can give it greater weight by concretizing it through an action, and so we leave three years' growth of hair uncut to recall a mitzvah that distinguishes trees; we do not take the fruit of a newly planted tree in its first three years, in its fourth year the fruit is sanctified, thereafter it is fit for typical use. Let us explore this mitzvah, as applied symbolically to a child.

The verse that contains this prohibition, Vayikra 19:23, uses three variations on the root of 'orlah: "va-'araltem", "'orlaso", "'areilim". The Sifra brings that the excess verbiage comes to teach that the prohibition is not just to use for food, as explicit in the verse, but also to dye with its color or to burn with its oil. Just as we are cautioned against three 'orlahs in a tree, there are three parts of the human body that are described with 'orlah in the Chumash; most commonly, 'orlah refers straightforwardly to the foreskin, but we see also Moshe Rabbeinu refers to himself twice as 'aral sefasayim (uncircumcised lips), and in parshas ha-yirah he instructs us, "u-maltem es 'orlas levavchem" (circumcise the foreskin of your heart). Each of these organs has a dual nature, for extraordinary good and for the three cardinal 'aveiros that we are called to die rather than transgress. The first mitzvah given in the Torah, piryah ve-rivya, to be fruitful and multiply, is the closest we come to participating in yesh me-'ayin, creation ex nihilo; the marital union is an image of the deveikus between Hashem and klal Yisroel. However, the same organ, misused, is giluy 'arayos, sexual transgression. The mouth is given to speak divrei Torah. Misused, lashon ha-ra' and halbanas panim, gossip and embarrassment, are both compared to murder. The gemara at the beginning of Ta'anis teaches, "mah hi 'avodah she-hi be-lev? Zo tefilah." (What is the service which is in the heart? Prayer). Of course, tefilah misused is 'avodah zarah, idolatry.

These three line up nicely with the uses described in the Sifra. Food and sexuality are both bodily appetites, often paired and compared. Between the red of spilled blood and the white of an embarrassed face, color seems to have a special emphasis in that class of transgressions; in general, there is a powerful connection to draw between visual imagery and the power of speech to activate the imaginative faculty. Kitur (burning) is in the category of actions deemed intrinsically worshipful, alongside bowing, sacrificing, and pouring libations. So, when we cut off the first three years growth of hair, we have in mind to discard the propensity to use these abilities for harm, and dedicate the new growth to sanctity, that our son should grow to build a bayis neeman be-Yisroel, a house of Torah and 'avodah.

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That said, while reviewing these thoughts for publication, I encountered a midrash that required an alternative approach.

Brought down in several places, Rabbi Akiva and Rabbi Yishmo'el discuss the four 'orlahs of a man: the three I had identified from chumash, and a verse I had neglected in Yermiyahu that declares, "hinei, 'areilah oznam" (behold, their ears are uncircumcised). 

So, if I want to preserve the parallel to the triple 'orlah of trees, which of these is not like the others? It occurs to me that 'orlas ha-guf should not be symbolically removed at the age of three; it has already been literally removed at the age of eight days. Further, the ears, the heart, and the mouth form a natural unit, a flow that can be blocked by obstruction at any of these three junctures. Language in general and Torah in particular comes in through the ears, is understood in the heart, and given over by way of the mouth. As far as the Sifra mentioned above, eating is to take in from without, like the ears; dyeing is to incorporate and be given form, like the heart; burning is to radiate outward, like speech. Alternatively, there is another opinion in the Sifra that the triple language comes to include every stage of development of the fruit, which would fit this metaphor where we consider a single flow of transmission and development of an idea.

There is a dual aspect of our special relationship with Hashem, established once at the time of the Avos as a family, then reestablished at the time of yetzias Mitzrayim and Matan Torah as a nation. The former is associated with bris milah, the covenant of circumcision, and so the latter is sometimes given the corresponding label of bris ha-lashon, the covenant of language, bringing out a major theme of that narrative and its associated mitzvos and yomim tovim. 

For those who have a particular rav from whom they receive their foundation in Torah learning, the relationship is compared in many ways to a father. Both father and rav are, in some sense, extending themselves by participating in the formation of the next generation in a deeply personal way. Ideally, a father should be his sons' first rav. The two relationships clearly correspond to the two covenants. So, at the time of bris milah, I bring the son of my body into the covenant of the body. At the age of three, whereupon children typically reach the linguistic and emotional development to begin a Torah education, I bring the son of my teaching into the covenant of Torah learning. In both cases, we discard the 'orlahs that represent blockage of the flow from one generation to the next. A father's physical input in forming his son is governed by a single organ, but the spiritual and intellectual input requires a three-fold path through ears, heart, and mouth. After he was shorn, we immediately gave our son honey to lick from the aleph-beis, to taste the sweetness of Torah, and then took him to the beis midrash to learn a pasuk with me, that the first fruits of the new growth should be dedicated to sanctity. 'Eitz chayim hi, the Torah is a tree of life.